Friday, June 29, 2007

'Yippee-ki-yay'

Live Free Or Die Hard

In the 80’s and 90’s we had action movie franchises. Lethal Weapon, Beverly Hills Cop, Rambo, Indiana Jones, and my personal favorite Die Hard. I can’t believe it’s been over 10 years. I can’t believe how many times I’ve seen the original Die Hard. It was one of the first action movies I really felt drawn too. What would I have done if I was in the Nakatomi Plaza that night? Thank God For John McClane.

Bruce Willis is back as All-American tough guy John McClane. The movies picks almost 20 years after McClane has rescued us from Hans that dreadful night in Los Angeles. Now the FBI database is hacked and John is sent to retrieve a hacker. When McClane arrives to pick up the kid he realizes he’s not the only one looking for him. Now John is on a mission to protect this kid and figure out why people are out to kill this harmless hacker.

This movie takes a new angle with hi-tech terror. This films bad guy is Thomas Gabriel (who’s constantly called by his full name through the movie) played by one of my favorite actors Timothy Olyphant. He’s believable as the cyber geek who’s hell bent on proving his point. He’s like that nerdy math tutor who’ll do anything to prove his point about hyperbolic geometry and will lecture you for hours about it, except in this film he’s proving a point about national security and putting everyone’s lives at risk, but I think you get the point. He’s also pretty cruel and equally funny at times. He’s almost likeable until you realize, “Wait a minute! He’s killing people”

Matt Farrell (Justin Long) is the hacker caught in the middle of this national disaster. He also provides some of the movies funny moments. As usual McClane provides classic one-liners as well as this hysterical laugh. It’s one of those, I can’t believe this is happening to me/ maybe I’m losing my mind laughs. He also seems to enjoy killing these people. He contiues to warn Gabriel that he's going to kill him as if he knows how something that the rest of us don't. Clerk’s Kevin Smith plays Warlock, another hacker in the film. His character alone is funny. He’s this hacker who ranks high on the FBI’s list but he lives at home with his mom. I think there is more truth in that than I want to believe.

You get the feeling in the movie that McClane is one of the last heroes we have left. When the country needs him, nobody can stop him. He even fights Gabriel’s girlfriend Mai (Maggie Q) and does not go easy on her. My pick for MTV Movie Awards – Best Fight next year. We are all in need of a hero these days and I think that’s why I was drawn to this movie.

Live Free Or Die Hard is a throwback to the old action movies. One of the best action movies I’ve seen in a while. Decent plot, good villain, and some pretty unbelievable action sequences. It’s a formula that worked for the first three Die Hard installments and does not disappoint this time around. Who would have thought a PG-13 action movie could be this good? Thank God for John McClane.

My Suggestion: Go see it! Especially if you’ve seen the first 3 or even watch the heavily edited versions on USA or TNT.

My Grade – 3.5: Great Job! You’re pretty consistent. Let’s hope you make the Dean’s List.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Black Entertainment?

It’s that time of year where there is absolutely nothing on TV, so BET decides to air its annual BET Awards. With very limited options I felt almost compelled to watch.

The show wasn’t a complete borefest. It did have its moments. A nice performance by Ne-Yo. He brought out Fabolus as well to perform his hit song “You Make Me Better”. Ne-Yo is way too Michael Jackson some times. I wonder if Jacko gets a percentage of Ne-Yo’s checks every time he does a live show. I always see this guy with the hat and all white or all black. I keep waiting for the beat from Smooth Criminal to start playing. Robin Thicke also put on a good show. Beyonce was Beyonce as usual. Is it me or does she seems to always win? If she’s breathing and even rumored to be at the show, she’s guaranteed an award. They’re going to give her a Lifetime Achievement Award for Most Awards Won next year. What was funny/sad about her performance was that Destiny Childs member Michelle was her back up dancer? How’s that possible? How does she not even get her own little solo two-step? That’s like me running a company with my friend, the company dissolves, I start my own company, and now my friend is my secretary. She was dancing so hard too. I felt bad for the girl. The show also featured a tribute to Diana Ross and James Brown. I felt like they were just thrown together. Would they do that for the Beatles? If I was Stevie Wonder I’d tell them that if that’s how they are going to honor me, I don’t want it.

Some of the low points of the show were really low. Some very weak performances from T.I (who I like) 50 Cent, a shouting match between Jennifer Hudson and Jennifer Holliday. Why was Jennifer Hudson up for so many awards anyway? She sang on a soundtrack, and doesn’t even have an album out. She’s getting all this love for singing ONE SONG. My theory: It’s Oprah! Before Dreamgirls was released Oprah said that Ms. Hudson sang that song better than anyone else. Somehow we’ve all bought into what Mighty O is telling us. I wish Oprah would say something about me. If Monday she said she loved my reviews I’d have a movie deal, book deal, and a few wedding proposals by Friday. The power of O.

There are a few things I would change about the show:

The Host – Why must we see Monique again? It was a replay of when she hosted two years ago. Sure Damon Wayans hosting was a sign that the world is coming to an end, but that’s no reason to bring back Monique. Is Samuel L Jackson busy? What’s Jamie Foxx doing these days? Dial him up next year.

The Presenters: Having celebrities’ present videos of fans to present the nominees. Easily the worst idea I’ve ever seen at an Award Show followed by reading the winners off a sidekick at the Source Awards. I went to a graduation this year and they had a speaker come out and introduce the person introducing the key note speaker. What? Why do we have a middle man? Some of the videos were funny but most of them were not.

Akon – The less he’s on TV the better

Speeches – Why have a speech? It’s an award show. It was funny to see Al Shartpon giving his 2 cents AGAIN. He’s gotta be up to about $500 now. On a side note I saw Lil Wayne and Nelly talking about how all Rap isn’t bad and I thought that was cool, but WHY WERE THEY READING OFF THE TELEPROMTER? If that’s what you do, you can’t say why it’s a good thing? It was like they didn’t even believe what they were reading. I was waiting for one of them to burst out laughing. Was I the only one annoyed by this?

Shameless Plugs – Enough with this. I know your album is coming out so stop saying it every time you win an award. It was comedy to see T.I. apologize for allegedly punching someone in the face at a brunch for the awards show the day before. At the end of the apology he plugged his album? C’mon T.I. you’re better than that.

Don’t get me wrong I love that BET has a show where they can showcase all that is to love about Black Entertainment but at some point they’ve got to step it up. A few tweaks here and there and they’ll have a quality show. Maybe they can have 50 random fans come down next year and each takes a turn hosting the show. That’ll get viewers

Monday, June 25, 2007

Children are our future

Children Of Men

Whitney Houston once sang "I believe that children are our future ". What if we lived in a world without children? What if we had no future? Children Of Men is a dark look at a future that none of us want to see.

The movie opens in London and the year is 2027. The city is mourning the death of the world's youngest person who happens to be 18 years old. The film follows Theo (Clive Owen) who is an ex activist/alcoholic as he assist Julian (Julian Moore) in leading the world's first pregnant woman in 18 years to safety. A fictional or non fictional group called The Human Project. As the movie moves on Theo starts to realize that everyone has their own agenda about what they want to do with the baby.

This is one of those movies you watch and ask yourself "Why didn 't I see this sooner." It's really a hard movie to sell because of the subject matter. The movie is dark at points and none of the characters seem to truly be happy. Men reminds me of one of those funny mirrors you see at a circus. It' s reflects what it sees but distorted in a distorted way. The movie was a reflection of what happens in our society today from the burning of the livestock to the immigrants being treated like anim als. Although this is not a "feel good " movie, it is thought provoking and will make you think about the future of our nations.

My suggestion: See the movie now. This may be a late hit among movie lovers or one of those films that's shown in film school.

My grade: 3.33 – Your parents are happy and may even let you take that weekend trip with your friends.

Pirates Blunder

Pirates Of The Caribbean – At Worlds End

Branded as one of this summer’s blockbusters and for some a “sure hit” At Worlds End does not deliver. The film was 167 minutes of slapstick comedy, cheap gags, double-crosses (too many to keep track), and a weak love story between Elizabeth Swann (Kiera Knightley) and Will Turner (Orlando Bloom). The plot seemed to be all over the place. After the film a friend called and asked me what the movie was about. I felt like I needed a flow chart to explain what was happening.

The best part about the over 2 ½ hours I spent in my squirming in my seat was the Transformers trailer that showed.(If I would have known that’s as good as was going to feel, I would have left. Encore movie channel had a Jaws marathon on) Unlike its predecessors, The Curse Of The Black Pearl and Dead Man’s Chest, At Worlds End replaces elaborate sword fighting scenes with witty one-liners from Jack Sparrow and big budget ship explosions and characters who’s problems never seem to get resolved. The most irritating scene of the movie is in the middle of a huge sword fight Elizabeth and Will decided to get married. I had no problem with that…….except that they actually recited vows to one another as Captain Barbossa played the role of the Minster. All three fought off bad guys while going through the ceremony. At points the lovely couple would be thrown into one another just long enough to gaze into each other’s eyes and say their vows.

The movie wasn’t a total waste. Bill Nighy does an excellent job as Davy Jones. He really brought a lot of life to that character that we didn’t see in the previous movie. I just wish we had more of him in the film.

My suggestion: If you feel you REALLY need to see it, I would rent, Netflix or borrow from some die hard Pirates fan who won’t admit the movie stunk. If you miss this last (hopefully) installment don’t feel bad. I’m going to pretend I never saw it.

My grade: 2.0 – Enough to get you on the basketball team, but your parents are going to be upset when you get home.

Knocked Up

Knocked Up

Still depressed about the $9.75 I spent to see Pirates Of The Caribbean 3: Waste Your Money On This . I realized I could have done a lot with that $9.75. I could have had lunch at Specialty's Bakery, food and drinks at happy hour, bought a health and fitness magazine I' ll never read (but looks really cool on my table) or even some new Star Wars stamps ! People are tired of hearing me complain about how much I couldn' t stand the movie. I really needed to see something good. I needed something positive to talk about. My choice this weekend was the comedy Knocked Up. Writer/Director Judd Apatow gives us is a fresh look at dating, relationships, marriage and pregnancy. Just not necessarily in that order.
Alison (Katherine Heigl) is out on the town after receiving a promotion and meets Ben (Seth Rogen). The two of them get drunk, have a one night stand, and 8 weeks later she realizes she' s pregnant. The film follows as both characters navigate through their lives as things start to change around this unplanned pregnancy.

Not only is this movie funny, I felt like Knocked Up is a very real movie with real characters and real dialogue. This is hard to find in cinema these days. Even with the raunchy jokes and foul language, the movie never feel off track. The conversations seemed to be plucked from real life and placed on film. From the awkward post one-night stand conversation, advice Ben and Alison receive from their friends and family, to the many discussions/arguments that you witness during the movie. It gives you that weird "maybe I shouldn' t be listening to this conversation " feeling. If you' ve ever walked in on your friend arguing with their spouse you know what I mean. I saw the movie with my friend and his wife. It all seemed so real to me, but then again I' m single. When I told them my feelings on the dialogue they agreed. I glanced over at them a few times during the film to catch a reaction and I could see them talking laughing as if they could relate.

One of the added bonuses of the film is Alison's sister Debbie (Leslie Mann) and her dissolving marriage with Pete (Paul Rudd). The two of them go back in forth in the film. It 's like they both can' t stand each other but are still really in love and just trying to figure things out. The parents-to-be look at them as maybe a glimpse into their not so happy future. Some of the films funniest moments come from Ben's roommates (Jason Segel, Jonah Hill, Jay Baruchel and Martin Starr) who argue fight like brothers. Also funny are two very short scenes with one of Alison's coworkers (Kristin Wiig) who makes very subtle but rude comments about Alison during a meeting with her boss.

Knocked Up is not a film about romance or a geek gets he girl tale. Don 't let the trailer for this film fool you. It 's a smart comedy and a real look at how this generation views relationships. You see how the characters grow throughout the film. There are some really good life lessons disguised as in slacker jokes and gross humor.

My Suggestion: Go see the film. You can A) get lost and laugh at all the jokes and take a timeout from life or B) Have a discussion about relationships and responsibility. I know you may think I 'm crazy for saying that, but see the film and then we'll see who 's crazy!

My Grade: 3.5 - The only reason you didn't get a 4.0 is to not show up your friends.

Not So Fantastic Sequel

Fantastic 4: Rise Of The Silver Surfer

This summer’s movie theme should be, “The Summer Of The Sequels.” I can think of 8 off the top of my head. They market these movies like it’s new material. It’s not! It’s just a remix of a film I watched 2 years ago. I know how I feel about a movie when I respond to questions my friends ask. Here is the actual exchange between me and my friend after the movie:

Friend: How was the movie?
Me: I bought tickets for Transformers

When the first thing out of my mouth is how I bought advanced tickets for another movie 10 days away, not good sign. Some would say it’s a bad sign. You be the judge. Our newest comic sequel , Fantastic 4 , fits the bill with familiar faces, likeable characters, new villains, and the same old story.

The movie opens with the media craze surrounding the wedding of Reed Richards (Ioan Gruffudd) and Sue Storm (Jessica Alba). The movie quickly picks up pace as there are sightings of a silver “comet” like figure on US spy satellites, along with these massive holes in the ground. The Four quickly piece together the what is going on. There have been planets with the strange matter activity and were being destroyed 8 days after the first Silver Surfer sighting. In order to fix things quickly team up with Dr. Doom (Julian McMahon) in hopes of finding the surfer and saving the world.

The movie has on ok premise, but seems to be stale at times. In Spiderman 3 if you took away all the special effects and cheesy dialogue, there was some sort of substance left in the movie. Fantastic 4 lacked that. Not that it was a bad movie, but that it could have been a better movie. One thing that bothers me the most was that the villains weren’t villainous enough. Dr. Doom sort of shows up, does a few bad things, and then leaves. You never got the feeling that they were really in any sort of danger. The relationship between the Surfer and Glactus was talked about but it would have been great to open the movie with a little back-story. I just didn’t feel connected if you know what I mean.

The comic relief of the movie was Johnny Storm (Chris Evans). He has some pretty good one-liners in the film that kept you laughing. Somehow they went away from that in the second half of the movie. The special effects were also very good. The scene where Galactus is eating earth is amazing. As you’ve see in the trailer the Surfer just looks cool, and thanks to Laurence Fishburne he also sounds cool. The first thing my friend said to me after the movie was “I would like to have seen more of the Surfer.” I couldn’t agree more.

My Suggestion: - See it if you need to. I wouldn’t wait in line to see it. There are at least 5 more sequels to come this summer so your $9.75 can wait for Rush Hour 3.

My Grade: 2.0 – Maybe you should study harder, but nobody else is so why should you.