BET Awards 2008

It’s time for another installment of the BET Awards. I invited my friend C-Ra over and thought it would be a great idea to do a running diary of this year’s show. Here we go………

The always entertaining Usher opens the show with his hit Love in This Club. I’m not a gambling man but I bet he’s lip-synching. If not he’s the only guy I know who can do consecutive back flips without losing his breath. Decent performance. What you would expect from Usher

DL Hughely is hosting this year’s show. His monologue is not that funny. I have no idea why his jokes didn’t hit…..oh wait they weren’t funny.

Wow a new season of Hell Date. Didn’t know the first one ended.

Young Jeezy performs. I like this track. Looks like Kanye forgot his words. I’m sure he’ll blame BET for it after the show is over. BET is real heavy on the censors this year. Way too many bleeps for this performance. I feel like I’m listening to an Emergency Broadcast.

It’s the best athlete performance. Surprisingly there are no white athletes on the list. Kobe Bryant wins the award this year. C-Ra comments that “he basically won best black athlete.”

How did Keisha Cole’s family get on TV? After they went of screen our exchange went something like this:
C-Ra: HA! Have you seen this show?
Me: Nope
C-Ra: Her mom is a TRAIN WRECK!

Keisha Cole and her new teeth perform. Nice voice! She can really sing. WOW! You gotta love the tear-away dress that turns into an all white cat suit. The crowd seems to really love Lil Kim. Looks like prison has done her some good. I assume there was nothing to do but sit-ups. What happened to her face? I think I’m officially scared of her.

Is it me or is Cuba Gooding Jr. higher than these gas prices. I think he has morphed into Rod Tidwell. I’m waiting for him to say, “Show me the money.”

Ne-Yo is suited up for his performance. It reminds of an old MJ routine. Nice set from Ne-Yo. He’s one of the R&B cats that I really enjoy. He always puts on a show.

LL hasn’t aged a bit. The guy is in ridiculous shape to be 65. I keep waiting to look up and he’s going to be old and flabby. Not sure that’s going to happen. Would anyone be surprised if his name popped up in the BALCO investigation?

Alicia Keys performs with a live band. Good set so far. Kicks it up a notch with an SWV cameo. Whoa! Here comes En Vogue! I know my dad is at home saying, “They still got it!!” If she brings out Xscape, I’m going home. I spoke too soon; TLC comes out and performs Waterfalls. Looks like Chili is drinking from the same fountain of youth that LL is. Nice set from Alicia Keys. The best performance of the night by far.

Best Male Hip Hop goes to Kanye West. He had to win something or he was going to spaz out at the after party. Nice gesture for him to bring Wayne on stage. I loved Kanye’s speech. He’s such an underdog and everybody wants to hold him down. Maybe that’s why he wins all those Grammy’s. (I think they’ve showed Lil Wayne about 50 times tonight. I feel like I’m watching a Lil Wayne reality show)

The Hilarious outfit of the night award goes to T-Pain. His “iced out top hat” his taller than me. Why does he look like the black Mad Hatter? I’m not sure I want to take my kids to his circus. Here comes Flo-Rida in a black tank top and jeans. C-Ra says he thinks that’s the only outfit Flo-Rida owns. Maybe he got a bad record deal, who knows. Here comes Rick Ross with no shirt on! He’s the anti LL Cool J. Let me get this right: BET will censor whatever Kanye was saying but they won’t censor Rick Ross and his man boobs? They should have had one of those parental advisory warnings, “What you are about to see is graphic and may disturb viewers under the age of 14.” I starting to think I should have waited to eat. They perform I’m So Hood Remix. Nice appearance from Ludacris. I’m not a huge fan, but not a bad set from T-Pain. They all put on a nice show.

Video of the Year goes to UGK and Outkast for Playas Anthem. It’s actually a very good video. I’m surprised it won. Real emotional speech from Bun B……….. RIP Pimp C

Here comes the Gospel portion of the show. One performance is not even 10%. This Marvin Sapp performance is not going to save you from the lake of fire BET.

Chris Brown puts on a show. I feel like I’m too old to like him. Nice cameo from Ciara gets C-Ra to sit up in his seat. Am I too old to like her too? It’s been a good show. So far the performances have been on point.

I think everyone and there mom has given Lil Wayne a shout out. Are they filming a DVD about his life?

T-Pain’s slow motion walking is comedy. Me and C-Ra joke that he wouldn’t pass a drug test right now. I’d bet my life on it.

Very nice tribute to Al Green. Jill Scott comes on stage and rips it, followed by Anthony Hamilton. That guy sounds just like Al Green. It must be the Apocalypse because Maxwell just hit the stage. I’m going to church immediately after the show is over. I hope he’s somewhere secretly working on an album. Everyone seems to love Al Green’s set. He is still a showman.

Lil Wayne wins his first award of the night. Somehow he managed to bring his whole family on stage.

Another performance at an award show from Rhianna. She looks like she dressed for the future. No dancers and no frills. Nice set from Rhianna as well.

Where has Nelly been? My first guess would be the gym. Cornelius is actually a good performer. I had no idea there was a, “Stepped on my J’s” dance. Ciara shows up again. I think C-ra’s head is going to explode. Yet another good performance. I must be dreaming.

My mom may read this, so no comment on Lauren London. I just think she should have her own TV channel.

Good to see Alicia Keys win. She has a really good album. Nice acceptance speech for her. She dedicated the award to everyone except me.

There have been a ton of shout outs for Obama. I think everyone in attendance is voting for him in November. I wonder if McCain gets that kind of love at the CMA’s.

T-Pain in another hat. Now he’s a mad scientist. Wayne hits the stage to lackluster applause. Maybe people are tired of Lollipop. I’m shocked they let Wayne say “lick me like a lollipop” on TV. I think the censors missed that one. Once A-Milli hit the crowd seems into his performance or it could be the fact that T-Pain tossed his hat. Nice performance from Wayne to end the show.

Good show from the folks over at BET. The award show has come a long way. I enjoyed it way more than I thought I would. Some really good performances on this year show. I almost wish I was there. Looks like a lot people stepped their game up. Hopefully they can come with the same energy next year.

Movie Review: Get Smart

Recently we’ve seen a lot of old TV show’s remade for the big screen. Unfortunately not all of them have been a success. For every Star Trek there is a S.W.A.T. This summer we’ve already seen Speed Racer crash after one lap around the track. X-Files is slated to take a second crack at the big screen later this summer. Get Smart is a good movie, but not so true to the TV show.

Maxwell Smart (Steve Carell) is Agent 86, one of CONTROLS best analyst. After CONTROL is attacked by KAOS most of the field agents have been compromised. With little man power to fight Agent 86 is forced out into the field and teams up with Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway) to take down KAOS.

Get Smart was surprisingly funny and full of action. I found myself laughing out loud a few times. Steve Carell was great as Agent 86. Clueless yet smart. His character just seems to be a tad bit socially awkward. Luckily 86 wasn’t a complete dork. He actually does some good fighting in the movie.

Anne Hathaway does a wonderful job as Agent 99. She’s definitely a lot younger looking than Barbra Feldon who was 99 on the TV show. Hathaway added a little more sex appeal to the role and still managed to pull off the fight scenes.

What I enjoyed most about the film was the supporting cast. Dwayne Johnson (looks like he officially dropped “The Rock” from his name) plays Agent 23. He is his usual charismatic self in the film. I’m surprised that he’s turned into a fairly decent actor. I’m going to start a campaign to have him play Bizzaro in the new Superman movie.

Terry Crews and David Koechner play the bullies of CONTROL. They two of them only have a few scenes in the movie, but those scenes have some laugh out loud moments. Crews is great at supporting roles in a comedy.

Masi Oka and Nate Torrence star as the geeks of CONTROL. Both of them seem excited to see Agent 86 out in the field.

My suggestion: Get Smart is a funny movie. Not the funniest movie I’ve seen all year, but worth going to see. The movie is a nice mix of both action and comedy. What I would like to call a nice, clean, family comedy. It’s hard to find comedies that my mom will sit through. This is definitely one of them. If you are going to see Get Smart the TV show, stay home because you aren’t going to get it.

Movie Review: The Incredible Hulk

Marvel has done it again. Early this summer it was the surprise hit Iron Man. The good folks over at Marvel followed up with another installment of The Incredible Hulk. A lot of people, including myself, were skeptical of this film because of the last failed attempt at this franchise. This Incredible Hulk is nothing like what we saw in 2003.

The movie opens as Bruce Banner (Edward Norton)a fugitive on the run who is living in Brazil, hiding from who he is, and trying to find a cure. Banner is quickly spotted by General Ross (William Hurt) and is on the run again. With no cure in sight Banner returns home to find some answers.

This movie reminds me of the old TV show that I loved so much. There are only going to be a few scenes with The Hulk. It was important that whoever played Bruce Banner could carry the film. I’ve been a huge fan of Edward Norton since Primal Fear and American History X. In this film Norton does such a great job of playing someone who does not want to be the Hulk. A man who is not happy with what he’s become and wants to find answers. Because of the Hulk he has to isolate himself from other people. You get the sense that he’s not sure he can control the monster within.

One of the great performances of the movie is Tim Roth as Emil Blonsky. An old soldier who wants who is obsessed with the power the Hulk possesses. His obsession with this power only grows stronger as the movie goes on. Blonsky reminded of the steroid issues in our sports today. A person who is past their prime who will inject themselves with anything for the opportunity to “win”.

My suggestion: Go see the Hulk. I don’t think this movie disappoints at all. If you are a fan of the comic book, it is a must see. I enjoyed every minute of it. Good script, great action and even a few laughs to keep the movie going. I loved what I saw out of this movie and I hope to see more. Not to mention there is a cameo at the end of the movie that had the whole theater buzzing. Can’t wait to see what Marvel does next.

Missing: Have you seen this man?

Let me start off by saying that I love Eddie Murphy. I grew up watching him on SNL and have enjoyed a lot of his work. I just wonder if that is really Eddie in all of those bad films. If so, he has the strange ability be involved in really great movies (see Coming to America, 48 Hours, Training Places, The Nutty Professor) and really bad ones. Here is a list of some of Eddie’s worst movies:


Beverly Hills Cop 3 (1994)

Axel Foley is on the trail to find who shot his boss. He stumbles upon a counterfeit money ring run out of a theme park called Wonder World.

This is one of those films I refuse to discuss. As a fan of the first to movies, Beverly Hills Cop 3 really upset me. This movie is a lot like Rocky V, if it wasn’t for the IMDB page, people would have no idea those movies were even made. What was he thinking making this movie? Did they pitch it as 48 Hours meets National Lampoon’s Vacation? He may have secretly been forced to make this movie. In this movie I swear he looked about as comfortable as those guys when they realize they are on Dateline’s To Catch a Predator. The poster in front of the roller coaster says enough.


Norbit (2007)

For some reason everyone I know has seen this film. Maybe they were attracted to see Eddie Murphy in a fat suit again. In this film Eddie stars as Norbit, a mild-mannered man who is trapped in a terrible relationship. He meets the girl of his dreams and tries to find ways to be with her.

Not sure how this movie missed the mark. There are a lot of talented people casted for this movie. For some reason they just couldn’t pull it together. I can see producers sitting around the table and saying, “I got it! Let’s put Eddie Murphy in a fat suit again.” This could easily be Eddie Murphy’s worst movie. The buzz around Oscar time was that this performance may cost him his Academy Award. It’s kind of ironic that one of the funniest comedians we’ve ever had is nominated for an Oscar, but loses because he has a terrible comedy come out the same year. Sounds like the plot for Eddie’s next crappy movie.

Vampire in Brooklyn (1995)

Murphy stars at Maximillian, a vampire who goes to Brooklyn to find a half vampire daughter.

Let’s see this movie is not funny, not scary, and barely entertaining. I didn’t want to see a 90’s version of Blacula. This movie is great if somehow you enjoy bad vampire movies. Vampire in Brooklyn is one of those movies that is so bad, you have to watch it. Eddie did show he could be good at playing a villain. Kudos to Eddie for trying something new, it’s just too bad I’ll never get those 2 hours of my life back.

The Adventures of Pluto Nash (2002)

The O.J Simpson You-Should-Quit-While-You’re-Ahead award goes to Pluto Nash. Murphy stars as nightclub owner Pluto Nash who, despite pressure from the mob, is trying to keep his club open in space.

Why did I see this movie? Two reasons: Rosario Dawson. Not even her beautiful smile could save this film. Mobsters in space? Really? It’s no wonder this movie was highly unsuccessful. What is surprising is that the films budget was estimated at $100 million (yes Dr. Evil $100 million) with a marketing cost of $20 million. According to Wikipedia as of 2008 this is the sixth-largest financial loss of any film ever made. I would hate to have my name attached to that project. I’m almost certain somebody lost their job behind this movie. I was recently roasted ay my birthday party. One of my good friends who lives out of town sent in a list of things she remembers about me. #10 on the list: Taking me to see Pluto Nash. This movie still haunts me today.


Holy Man (1998)

Eddie plays a man who is in search of enlightenment. During his journey he decides to help a man save his job.

Why make this movie? Was Murphy close to being an insurance salesman so he desperately needed money? I swear he spent 90% of the movie smiling like a crazed mental patient. I’ll stick by my theory that he signed on thinking Holy Man was a movie where he would be playing Jesus. At the last minute they change the script, but he had a legal obligation to make this movie. There is no other logical explanation for him to be attached to this film.


Showtime (2002)

You would think that Robert DeNiro and Eddie Murphy would be a sure hit. Not so much. When you look this movie up on IMDB one of the keywords is “Box Office Flop”. In Showtime, Murphy stars as Officer Sellars. After botching an investigation and shooting a camera the LAPD decided to let this reality TV show follow Sellars and Mitch (DeNiro) around filming what life is like for the LAPD.

Not only is the concept of this film utterly ridiculous, there is zero chemistry between the two stars. Eddie Murphy looked like he was being held hostage, and DeNiro had about as much joy on his face as Hilary Clinton did when she congratulated Barack. I know it’s hard to pass up an opportunity to work with legendary actor Robert DeNiro but maybe Eddie should have thought twice about this buddy cop movie. At least we still have 48 Hrs.

Dr. Dolitte 2 (2001)

Murphy returns at Dr. John Dolittle. This time he’s playing matchmaker for a Circus Bear.

Do you realize he spent all day working with animals, and talking to himself? There has to be footage somewhere of him sitting in his trailer depressed. What gives me a headache about this movie is that it was completely unnecessary. He played the worst movie doctor since Dr. Giggles. I hope a lot of kids loved this movie because I know a lot of people who didn’t.

Bowfinger (1999)

Eddie plays Kit and Jiff Ramsey. A struggling producer makes a movie for Kit. When he’s unable to cast Kit in the film, he cast his not so cool brother Jiff so he can secretly film the movie without Kit’s knowledge.

The movie never gets funny. It’s incredibly painful to watch. Mentioning this movie to Eddie may result in a fight. I saw this movie in Canada and it was beyond terrible. I remember thinking, “Maybe Canada gets different versions of movies. These Canadians are funny! There is no way Eddie Murphy would make this movie in America.” I almost asked for my toonies back. When I returned to the states I realized what I saw was the American version of Bowfinger. If I was Eddie I would use some of that Shrek money to buy the rights to Bowfinger and quickly destroy every existing copy. It only makes sense.

Movie Review: Sex and the City

There is good news and bad news for all male moviegoers.

The good news? There is less than two months until The Dark Knight opens in theaters.

The bad news? It looks like we will be hearing about Sex and the City until then.

The movie starts right where the show left off, following the lives of Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker), Samantha (Kim Cattrall), Charlotte (Kristin Davis), and Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) around New York City.

The movie picks up pace rather quickly as Big (Christopher Noth) and Carrie are set to be married. This would be the perfect ending for everyone’s favorite couple. Of course there is some drama that surrounds their pending nuptials. What would Sex and the City be without its drama? Miranda and Steve (David Eigenberg) have a few issues to work out, as well as Samantha dealing with her life adjustment and boyfriend Smith (Jason Lewis).

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not a huge fan of the show. I watched the first 2-3 seasons religiously, but found myself bored soon after that. With that said, the movie was surprisingly entertaining and well written. Some of the really tense moments in the film really pull you in and allow you to feel for the characters involved. The funny moments are well placed so you won’t feel like you are watching some serious drama.

Kristin Davis was great as Charlotte. She helped keep the movie light and fun for those of us who were not going to cry our eyes out. Jennifer Hudson plays Louise, Carrie’s assistant, adding some humor and a fresh face to the cast. Louise seems fit right in.

In the tradition of the show, there are some good scenes with the four women discussing their views on relationships. As a man I find these scenes very interesting. Do women really talk like that?

One of the glaring questions I had was, for the male characters in the movie: Where are their guy friends? I know the show doesn’t revolve around the men, but I didn’t see any groomsmen with Big. When I brought this up to my female friends they say “we’ll that’s just how he is” or “he’s always been a loner.” What successful guy has no male friends? The only guy I can think of is Michael Jackson. That’s really not good company for Big to be in.

I wonder if an Entourage movie would be just as entertaining.

My suggestion: If you are a fan of the show, you’d be a fool not to watch this movie. It’s a must see for all Sex and the City fans. Without giving away too much of the movie, I’d compare it to the Lakers making it through the playoffs and then I decide not to watch the NBA Finals. It’s entertaining and has a lot of good points in the movie. There is some nudity and some sex in the movie. If you are offended by that I’d wait for the edited version on TNT. The movie may spark some good conversation. I had a discussion with Ms. LA last night about different points in the movie. She was surprised we agreed on a major point in the movie. I’m not surprised at all; she’s a believer in love. I think most people will enjoy this movie. The film will at least provide you with some fun conversation with your friends at happy hour.